Anticipation – A Short Story, Re-told

For the Sixth Day of the Write Tribe Festival of Words, I am going to do some cheating. I am going to pass off an older piece as a new one. Read on, and we will discuss it at the end of the story.

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“Fuck man, so what, even I haven’t finished revising the syllabus!” screamed Abhiuday to his friend Parthiv. “Stop complaining. You aren’t the only one, so just chill, yaar!”

The boys were standing outside the Exam Hall on the top floor of their school. All except one of the 12th Finals Prep exams were finished. The one remaining, though, was the mother of them all – Maths. And consequent to the whims of the scheduling masters of the school, right after the Maths test today, the students were to disperse for a couple of days before meeting again one last time at the school premises for the Senior Class Farewell. As was to be expected, this strange calendar mix of stress and joy had led to a quaint mood pervading through the air – it could only be described as taut yet audacious anticipation.

Right now, however, around the boys milled their classmates in various shades of unease, some even bordering on despair.

“You really don’t believe me, do you?” said Parthiv earnestly. “I don’t think I am going to survive this test!”

“It’s not the end of the world, yaar! We still have a month before the Boards! You’ll be fine!” Abhiuday remarked nonchalantly as his eyes remained distracted towards the stairs coming up to their floor.

“No, it won’t help. And how are you so calm, saaley? Have you been studying without me?” questioned Parthiv, suddenly sounding even more tense.

“Are you crazy? Ok, now shut up, here she comes!” said Abhiuday, his voice suddenly falling several decibels. He gave up his slouch, straightened his back and shoulders to appear tall and manly. He also crinkled his forehead just above the nose because he felt it made him look very earnest. His eyes were parked on Ankita, their classmate, who was slowly emerging from the stairs.

Parthiv’s eyes followed his friend’s. He shook his head subconsciously and let out a long breath. His eyes connected with Ankita for a second, who then immediately looked away like all self-aggrandizing girls are prone to do.

Just as she approached them on her way to the Exam Hall door, Abhiuday called out to her.

“Hey, Ankita!”

Ankita turned, feigning that she had only just noticed the boys, again, like all self-aggrandizing girls are prone to do.

“Oh hi, guys! How is it going?” she said, with a smile so bright that it immediately seared Abhiuday’s heart.

“Oh nothing much, just helping Parthiv revise some last minute theorems,” said the boy after unobtrusively gulping some saliva to activate his parched vocal chords. Parthiv looked at his friend and almost rolled his eyes.

“Great!” the girl said. “I am so nervous, I feel I haven’t prepared for the exam at all. I am definitely going to fail!” the girl continued with her pretention.

“Me, too…” Parthiv tried to speak but was cut off by his pal momentarily.

“Oh, I am sure you will do fine!” said Abhiuday. “In fact,” he added, “maybe we should aim to do some practice for the Boards during the holidays. What say?”

“Oh, I don’t know…you know?” said the girl as she coquettishly tucked imaginary strands of hair behind her ears.

“It will be great fun. I mean, we will study hard and help each other out!”

The girl looked unconvinced. Slightly bemused actually.

“Hey, we can even have Parthiv help us revise. He is very good at that. I swear!” he pleaded throwing sideway glances at his buddy.

Parthiv could only stare disbelievingly at his friend’s indulgence.

“Aw, ok. Maybe we can try it out,” she gave in finally.

The excited Abhiuday was thrilled to bits but wouldn’t let the feeling percolate to the exterior. In fact, he felt sanguine enough to take the course of this conversation to a new level of boldness.

“Hey, I was also meaning to ask…,” he started slowly, “would you like to be my date for Friday?”

There. It was out.

The girl stared at him starkly. Then her gaze shifted to Parthiv. Their eyes locked for a few moments before he broke away and turned his back to the couple.

“You know what? Sure, why not?” was all she said as she left the boys and made her way into the Exam Hall.

 

 

“You haven’t prepped with me at all and now I am going to fail,” mumbled Parthiv as they settled behind each other in the Exam Hall. Their common surname ensured that they had always been consecutive all through their school years. “If that happens…”

“There, you have started again,” riled his friend. “Ok, now shut up,” he added as the exam bell clanged loudly.

“And, hey, best of luck, fucker!” he parted as the room went silent.

 

 

Parthiv was silent as the boys left the hall three hours later.

“Phew…I am glad that is out of our system!” exclaimed Abhiuday. He looked at his quiet friend.

“Sorry, yaar, I couldn’t spend more time with you these past few weeks. You see, with my cousins in town, then the wedding…and then I have been so distracted with Ankita, I just couldn’t concentrate!” Abhiuday went on. “But I promise, it will be just you and me till the Boards end. We will study together and we will both do well!” he added usefully.

“Really?” was Parthiv’s retort. “What about that bitch that you invited to you bedroom?”

“Hey, come on, man! What do you have against Ankita, you fucker?”

“Oh nothing, fucker! Just that she is a bitch and you had better keep away from her!”

“Oh and how do you know she is a bitch, you loser?”

“I know. Believe me, I know!” said Parthiv in an anguished tone. “Please man, just stay away from her. You and I – we have to work together for the Boards. Like we always have. We can’t afford not to! She is just going to ruin everything. Everything!”

Abhiuday was taken aback at his friend’s insistence.

“Hey, why are you getting so emotional about a stupid exam, you fucker?”

The boys stared at each other for several minutes. Neither spoke.

“You know what, man, just chill. We will talk about it later, ok?” said Abhiuday finally.

As the boys parted, only one turned to look back.

 

 

Abhiuday entered his house at around 4 pm. He was humming a recent Robin Thicke song as he walked into his room and flung his school bag on the settee. As was normal routine, the first task he did was to walk up to the computer on his study table and hit the ‘Enter’ key on the keyboard. The giant iMac quickly sprung to life. Angry as he was with Parthiv, he still had a huge impulse to IM him about their plans to meet up in the evening.

“Hello, Abhi.”

It was his mother’s voice from the door. The boy swung around, surprised to see his mother home at this early hour. She was usually at the club around this time.

“Mom, you home?” he said as he sensed from her expression that something was amiss. “What’s wrong?” he said wanting to confirm his intuition even as he started to walk towards her.

“Come sit with me,” she said instructing him to join her as she sat on his bed.

“What’s wrong, Mom?” the boy repeated.

“How was the exam?” the mother said, attempting to distract her son.

“It was okay. Exams are over, finally. Who cares about the Pre-Boards anyway? Is that what you are worrying about? I am telling you – the Boards will be fine!”

“I see. Anything else happen in school today?” the mother continued with her subtle investigation even as her voice trembled slightly. The boy didn’t notice.

“I, errm…nothing much. Just made some plans for the Farewell party on Friday” Abhiuday continued, deciding not to divulge any details about Ankita to his mother just yet. Maybe on Friday, he thought.

“And Parthiv?” explored his mother.

“He can be such an asshole, Mom! Kept cribbing about the exam all day. Anyway, I will see him in the evening. We have to plan for Friday – it’s going to be a sick partaay!” exclaimed the excited boy, not immediately noticing the sudden tears welling in his mother’s eyes.

“Oh mere bachchey!” cried the mother as her self-control finally gave way completely. She clasped at her boy’s hands between frantic sobs.

“Mom!” yelled the alarmed boy, not comprehending the situation.

“Parthiv’s mom called fifteen minutes ago,” the mother managed to speak between deep gasps. “He killed himself at home,” said the mother pulling her son’s face to her shoulder.

Held in an incongruous embrace by his mother, Abhiuday stared stolidly past the room at his computer screen. The instant message window was active, flashing, desperately seeking attention. Try as he might, and despite his proximity, Abhiuday couldn’t tell what it said.

 

Later, as Abhiuday retrieved on his computer the last words from the boy who was no more, he read, “VIBGYOR. And you never got it, you fucker. Until next time, Peace!”

 

Anticipation is a short story I wrote earlier this year. It had a morbid ending and some folks who are used to seeing a very different writing style from me didn’t like that. Another thing that bothered folks was its vagueness. The earlier version did not have the last line that this version has – where Abhiuday reads the message from the departed.  Imagine the possibilities without that last sentence! Consequently, the story left more ‘whys’ in its trail than it answered. I know some readers who came up with their own versions of the reason behind Parthiv’s action – all of them were logical. Frankly, that’s what I wanted to achieve at the time, so I was happy that the story led people who read it to mull over it for a bit. 

When I chose to participate in the Write Tribe Festival of Words, its theme being – SEVEN – it made perfect sense to close the story with one of those logical ‘whys’.

I like this story personally, despite its horrid end and all, and I hope you enjoyed reading it, too. Do try to imagine the possibilities of the story without the last sentence, perhaps you will find that as intriguing as I did!

 

 

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I am taking part in The Write Tribe Festival of Words 1st – 7th September 2013. The theme is SEVEN.

 

Comments

comments

22 thoughts on “Anticipation – A Short Story, Re-told

    1. Rickie Khosla Post author

      Ah ok…so perhaps it is not so well known among the desis then. The rainbow is the universal colour of gay pride. VIBGYOR represented the rainbow.
      Without the new ending, this story could have many meanings – perhaps Parthiv was depressed about the exams, perhaps he was depressed about his friend chasing an unsuitable girl, perhaps he had feelings for the girl himself etc.
      With this ending, it became all about the boy’s latent feelings about his friend and the courage that he never could muster to express them.
      Hope that makes it clearer. Sorry for yet another bouncer! 😀

      Reply
      1. BhavanaDiary

        Of course I know about gay pride, how stupid of me for not realizing that after having good friend here who is a gay. Sometimes I am too slow to catch up.
        If that is the case, it is really sad story..Poor boy…

        Reply
  1. Aditi

    Well frankly the last line left me confused….without it perhaps the interpretation and the reason was obvious… But now I’m all curious….

    Reply
    1. Rickie Khosla Post author

      Ah ok…so perhaps it is not so well known among the desis then. The rainbow is the universal colour of gay pride. VIBGYOR represented the rainbow.
      Without the new ending, this story could have many meanings – perhaps Parthiv was depressed about the exams, perhaps he was depressed about his friend chasing an unsuitable girl, perhaps he had feelings for the girl himself etc.
      With this ending, it became all about the boy’s latent feelings about his friend and the courage that he never could muster to express them.
      Hope that makes it clearer.
      Thanks for reading the story…and sorry for the bouncer!

      Reply
    1. Rickie Khosla Post author

      Since no one seems to have got the meaning of the last sentence, I am just copy/pasting the same explanation for every comment – The rainbow is the universal colour of gay pride. VIBGYOR represented the rainbow. It is clear to me now that perhaps the symbol is not so well known in India.
      Without the new ending, this story could have many meanings – perhaps Parthiv was depressed about the exams, perhaps he was depressed about his friend chasing an unsuitable girl, perhaps he had feelings for the girl himself etc.
      With this ending, it became all about the boy’s latent feelings about his friend and the courage that he never could muster to express them.
      Hope that makes it clearer. Sorry for yet another bouncer! 😀

      Reply
    1. Rickie Khosla Post author

      The earlier version didn’t have an explanation. So, really, it could have been anything. I had actually written it with the point of view that it was Parthiv who had had a clandestine relationship with Ankita that had ended badly.
      With the ‘seven’ theme, it seemed like a great plot twist to end it this way instead.
      Thanks for liking it!

      Reply
  2. vishalbheeroo

    I am also asking, Why?” So well narrated and I love the humor throughout that makes it today’s times and the problems faced by generations. It celebrate the ode of friendship and with a bang. Totally my kind. I am shocked with the end. Cheerz

    Reply
    1. Rickie Khosla Post author

      I had left the ending open in the original version – but in my mind, I had plotted a conventional ending.
      When this festival came along, where the theme was ‘seven’, it made sense to employ the Rainbow as a plot element!

      Reply
  3. Rachna

    Ah, so now you did bring in an ending and answered the quintessential question. It is heartbreaking when kids take their lives :(. I remember feeling very disturbed when I read this story the first time.

    Reply
    1. Rickie Khosla Post author

      Anything that shows sadness in children’s lives disturbs us all…even non-parents. And that is why it bothers me even more that there actually exist people who can abuse kids – physical, emotional, whatever! I wonder how their brains could be wired so differently from yours and mine.

      Reply

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